it never left

Years past I still recall the moment it was going to happen. Beaten and belittled. “Can’t you see you’re not wanted”, still sounds like it was just said. What do you think about a foster home? I don’t remember what. The friends disappeared as life went on. Good memories nonexistent. Bad ones rise like a victory flag. I still remember looking down as he slept. Could I do it? Could I make the hurt go away like that. The wooden handle from the kitchen barely fit my hand. Imagination thought I could. But I couldn’t. I thought about it. bedThe thought of ending my haunted mind, body and soul. I could have made it go away a long time ago. I never did anything to deserve what I got. I was only a kid. A kid who never knew why. I could have ended him as he slept. I went to the kitchen and put it away. I went back to bed and locked it inside. I wonder how life would have been if …

 

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